A Plastic Box
My sons ashes aren’t in an urn. He sits on my dresser, inside the bag with a charred metal tag, … Continue Reading A Plastic Box
Bereaved Parents Month
July is Bereaved Parents month.When you first lose your child, everyone is profoundly impacted by your tragedy. Everyone mourns your … Continue Reading Bereaved Parents Month
Sloan’s 3rd Annual Memorial
3 years. 1,096 days. That’s how long it’s been since my arms last felt the weight of your body. Since … Continue Reading Sloan’s 3rd Annual Memorial
Bath Time & Bereavement
On your last night, I bathed you. You had two favorite places, my arms, and water. Bath time was sheer … Continue Reading Bath Time & Bereavement
Approaching 3 Years
A week from today, will be 3 entire years since Sloan left his earthly body. When he died, the subject of child loss and bereavement was still very little discussed. Watching grief and the experiences of bereaved parents begin to … Continue Reading Approaching 3 Years
June
Every June, I get a little trapped in my grief. June was the last full month of Sloan’s life. I … Continue Reading June
Scars
The week before you died I accidentally burned my forearm on my curling wand. It had been the second time in a month I’d done so. You had been at my feet playing as I curled my hair, and I … Continue Reading Scars
Belongings & Bereavement
I went through his things today. Many of them I hadn’t seen since he was alive. The things that had … Continue Reading Belongings & Bereavement
A Day Like Today
It is Bereaved Mother’s Day today. A day I never knew existed until suddenly, I existed in its cause. It’s … Continue Reading A Day Like Today
Grief Police
I have read my fair share of hateful things since Sloan’s death. Everyday there’s someone new leaving a comment somewhere, deciding their opinion of me and bereaved parents like me, has any bearing on the necessity of our authenticity. In … Continue Reading Grief Police
Comparison and Grief
There is a LOT of comparison in the world of child loss and bereavement. I see so many comments and messages from grieving people that contain something like “I know my loss isn’t like yours but…” and it saddens me. … Continue Reading Comparison and Grief
Home
Last night as I was tucking Rowan in to bed he started crying. I asked him what was wrong and … Continue Reading Home
This is the Space I Occupy
For two weeks now I have been trying to move past the response I got when I posted that short … Continue Reading This is the Space I Occupy
I Did the Dishes
People think they know how they’d react, what they’d do. You don’t. Grief is experienced differently by everyone. It is managed differently by everyone. I did the dishes when my son died. After we’d held his lifeless body for hours, … Continue Reading I Did the Dishes
Sticks and Stones
Did you know I have to have a filter set up on my Instagram to keep certain hurtful words and comments from my viewing? That a friend has my login info so that she may sort through my DMs to … Continue Reading Sticks and Stones
Wishes
I wish I had taken more photos. Documented his milestones, saved all the measurements and savored each new moment. I … Continue Reading Wishes
