Since Sloan’s death, I have been contacted by thousands of people. A vast majority have been messages of support, kind and uplifting words from those who were impacted by his story. But a fair amount of messages have been sent from other parents of loss, and I’ve wanted to write something here for them.
I know. I know what it feels like. To be angry, to be distraught, to be lonely, to be devastated, to be broken. I understand the thoughts you have that you don’t verbalize, the places your mind goes when you’re quiet. I have felt the weight you carry, I am still carrying my own.
I know what it’s like to carry on a conversation about your child stoically, silently screaming “don’t cry, push through” to yourself. I have let someone speak for quite some time and realized I’ve heard nothing they’ve said. I understand the inner conflict of needing company, and yet wanting to be alone. I know it’s easier to let the tears fall when you’re by yourself, that it’s too difficult to let your guard down when you’re not.
I understand that your grief consumes you, even when you’re enjoying yourself. We are now a part of something we never asked for, walking a path we did not choose. Each new day is uncharted, and yet they all start and end the same for us.
I want you to know that I get it.